Potential Homocide from the use of Pogo Sticks?

Found on Stuff News.

Firstly I have to say that poor boy!  What a horrible way to die. (assuming the story is real and homocide is less a typo and more something I have never heard of)

Then I am forced to explore the combination of language.  Firstly 'probe'.  Maybe I am weird but it gives a certain connotation when mixed with 'pogo stick' and 'homocide'???

Words from the Playground

Teacher- "are you alright?"  as Year 7 boy tries to adjust his school shorts
Student-" yes, but I am suffering from wedgies"

Suffering sounds more extreme that just a plain underpant problem, but I ain't checking it out.  I just hope it is not catchy!

Teacher- "why are you swearing?  Wouldn't your mother be embarrassed to hear you speaking like that?"
Student- "no, she swears too.  Mostly at Dad and the neighbours"

Nice!  And worse!  They live in an apartment so there are HEAPS of neighbours.

And my favourite for this week-

Teacher- "The bell has gone!  Why are you still on the playground and not back in class!!???"

Student- "my mother told me not to speak to strangers and I only know 2 people in my class, so I am staying here instead of talking to them."

Now THAT is clever thinking!!!  He might not have even been spotted had his feet not been hanging off the end of the slide!

The Big, Hairy, Black Tomato Bandit.

I am fortunate to have a beautiful vege garden that grows luscious, abundant tomatoes.

Some time during the last few years, our dog discovered a new love for tomatoes and has now set about nicking them off the tomato bush.  She doesn't mind if they are ready, she doesn't mind if they are a bit over done.  She doesn't mind if they still have the stem attached, or if I have just biffed them into the trees because the birds have pecked them.  She is a machine and happily chases down any biffed tomato as if it is a personal quest to single handedly rid the world of the red orb!

I thought she was only having them when I threw them to her or near her, but no!  She is a slave to her stomach and has learned to help herself.

She has developed this technique with her doggy lips (yes, doggy LIPS) where she carefully wraps her lips around the tomato, cherry tomatoes being her favourite,  and plucks them off the bush. 

Once she jumped onto the back of the ute with something clearly held in her closed mouth.  After much coaxing she finally opened her jaws and about 20 cherry tomatoes of all colours and ripeness fell from her mouth and bounced all over the tray of the ute.  Not one marked by tooth indentations.  Those doggy lips at work!
At being caught, she had the good grace to look embarrassed and not rush to regather her stolen hoard.     Her thievery was discovered a few years when beneath the farm kennels where she had been housed for a while, a tomato plant began to sprout!  Hmmmmm, wonder how that got there??

Today Mum and Rhoda came to help me catch up on the harvest to see if we can beat the dog to the tomatoes!  We were away last weekend so things have got a little out of hand with the garden.  Mum went home with about 4 bags to 'veg out' with and I totally appreciate the catchup!  :)

Movie of the Cat

Thanks to Jacqui, I am working on movies for my blog, so here is the cat torturing the washing.

It's Been Ages

But I'm back and also impressed that there is now auto correct has been added!!! Although I am impressed with my own spelling and grammar ability, self praise is no recommendation.

I am also trying to add photos to make it more interesting.

Found this cool tree on Great Barrier and it was completely hollowed out.  

For those times you wished you had waited a beat before you spoke,,,

During the weekend, I went to Kings Plant Barn with a man I am quite fond of, but who shall remain nameless. 

As we drove in, a couple were getting out of their station wagon and the woman went round to the back of the car and bought a medium sized black Lab out. 

The commentary beside me began.   One sided, as I don't really care if people bring their dogs…. anywhere really….. except inside my own house…. I am dog tolerant.

……" why do people bring their dogs to places like this?"

"imagine if we bought Bear, imagine the size of her poops,  (not the word used),  imagine them having to get the front end loader to clean up after her"
(This is true.  Disgustingly so!  When we hit those dog mines with the mower, it is not a pretty sight!)

"what if the dog got away on them and bit someone?"  (Or more in Bears case, slobbered on someone and they drowned in her goobs)

"what if it was a male dog and it peed (not the word used) on everything?"  (nothing to add here, never owned a male dog)

"people really are stupid!  Maybe their house is being robbed right now?"  (yes, but at least no one would steal the dog?????!!!)

"whats the point in having a dog and then taking it away from where it should be protecting?"  (Errrr, somewhat like Bear protects our house ……..????????  Oh yeah, you shake in your boots, you wanna be burglars!!!!!)



"oh, look at that, do they have a car seat for that dog too?  Damn townies!"

The owners continued to bring their dog round the side of the car and the man arrived with a collar and lead.  He knelt down, chatted to and smooched the dog and began to put the leads on the rather well behaved dog.  The muttering continued from beside me as we parked and began to get out of the car. 

Next thing you know the BLIND man put the SEEING EYE HARNESS on the SEEING EYE DOG and with his white cane made his way around the side of the car, to which I exploded into belly shaking delight!!!!

 I could hardly breath and I spluttered "karma just kicked your negative arse!!!"  and then  to many more uncontrollable gaffawwws,  that had the blind man sensing the sound waves and both he and dog were looking around for the explosion.  The sound waves of complete and utter unravelling were coming from our car!!!!

"serves you right, BAZINGA!"  (thanks Sheldon) I crowed!  Very seldom getting one over this particular man!

I loved it.  For the rest of the day (and for eternity, actually)  my response to anything negative will always be, "and then the seeing eye dog got out of the car!"

Yep, those times you wish you had just shut the ……… heck up!  But for a change……… NOT ME!

My Friend, the Big Girl at School- continued.....

Last night I received an email about my previously mentioned young man who thinks I am his 'friend at school'. 

Although I have explained to him and surely modeled to him that I am the Principal, he doesn't seem to make those connections.

Some stuff that you need for context- 
this child comes to my office every single break AND first thing in the morning (to hang out)
Mr Fowler (referred to in the sent email) is my brother, who works part time doing hard materials
I have tried to explain HEAPS of times who I am AND this is not his first school!!!!!???  He has had another Principal.

So the email (Thanks Sara) reads thus:

Your wee boy was funny today…he came looking for you in your office and I wrote on the back of the note he carried, that you had gone out.
He asked what I had written and I told him that I said "the Boss was out." 
He looked at me confused….So I said that "you were all the teachers and the kids Boss".
He said, but what about Mr Fowler!!!????
 
 I told him that you were his boss too.  He looked a bit unhappy about that.

"So who's Mrs Fowlers boss?" he asked.
I didn't think he'd understand and just said "you were the boss of the school…"
he said 'The Government is the boss"…
He obviously has some understanding...... 
Then he said "I want to be the boss of the Government and be the prime minister…" 

He could be all our boss one day! :)

I am worried on several levels-

Firstly, I don't want this child to be our future Prime Minister although life would be pretty fascinating, especially foreign relations as he says it like it is.  Really, like it is! 
Secondly, I don't want my brother to be my boss (there is only one true boss(y) person in most families.
Thirdly,  and finally,  how can I explain who I am without breaking my new BFF's heart????