New, Scary Family Members....yeah, right!

We have a new dog.

The old one is not so happy and the cat has definitely packed a sad, but the new puppy is happy and oblivious.  Ian has always been very adamant that there is only one dog, but on the 17th May this year, whilst seeing Mum through her final days, our house was burgled.  Our large and sooky guard dog was doing this....

Yikes, now that I listen to that it sounds like something out of Blair Witch Project, so just understand it is REALLY  loud dog snoring!!!   Obviously she was not sleeping in front of a fire in the carport, but the sound was the same, only amplified by the sound shell that is our carport.

So, a long story short, I came home early from the hospital and parked my car in the garage.  The dog was asleep and snoring in the carport.  I woke her up and as I unlocked the door, heard a massive crash from inside.  "Hmmmmm........?" I ponder.  Then promptly forget as the 'she is home' joy overwhelms me from the formerly asleep Black Lab!  "I love you.... I love you... do you have food?.... I love you... food?... bone..... throw ball?... come on over here and have a big lick..... food?"

So I had scared the rotten burgler creeps off.   As a sideline they got the guy and he has pleaded Not Guilty and claims he was in the house, 'servicing the air conditioning unit' THAT WE DON'T EVEN HAVE!!!  Yeah, good luck with that, dumb arse!

I was cute when I was only 17kgs.....

So... back to the puppy.  She is an American Bulldog, Mastiff, Staffordshire X.  She is a mongrel, but a scary looking one.  She is 6 months and she is taller than the lab and probably as heavy.  Last time I took her to the vet, she was 23kgs!!

The downside is that I have taken her to school (because she was too young to leave all day by herself) and she is so socialised that she may well think she should be in uniform!!  She is soft and gentle and just loooovvees the kids and the only time I hear her bark is when she is trying to play!!!

"It's silk and it feels sooooo nice against my skin....."

Her name is Sasquatch because her feet are the size of dinner plates!  Sassy for short and she could not have come along at a better time.  Not because I think she will scare future 'air conditioning servicemen' off, but because she has given me something else to smile about.

Go Sassy!  (...who has broken several pot plants, dug in my garden, pulled washing off the line, chewed the lining out of my boot, stolen my gumboots, made a hole in the hedge, put paws up on my white pants, chewed up a rare orchid,  chased the chooks, pooped in the garage, tried to hop in the spa pool, wrecked the outside wicker chair, eaten a blouse.... and made sad eyes so you have to forgive her!!!)

 Lucky she is so good at making up........

Thanks everyone at school.  We convince ourselves it is good for the kids, but actually, it is probably better for the adults and heaps more interesting than the previous lambs :)

...and she will be missed....

Our Mum has recently passed away after a very short illness.  I don't share her deep faith and I can only wish that when my time comes and I am faced with my own demise, that I can be as gracious and positive as our Mum was.  She was sure she was going to see Dad, so she was actually pretty happy!!!!???!!

Now for the humour, which Mum would have love to have read, as my biggest Blog fan.  Mum did two hilarious thing in her final weeks.  Now keep in mind, she was on heavy morphine, but she was f-u-n-n-y!!!!

First incident:  Mum was worried that she would be keeping other residents of the care facility she was in, awake because she was a bit deaf and needed the TV up quite loud to be able to enjoy the actual dialogue.  We bought her a headphone set, so she could have it as loud as she liked.  One day, she had the headphones on and totally oblivious to the fact that she was the only one that could hear it, she proceeded to sing the opening theme music to 'Rawhide' at the top of her voice.  All of it.  Including the rather extended Raaaaawwwwwwhhhhhhiiiiiddddddddddeeeeee!  It echoed up and down the hallways and only a few startled health care workers stuck their heads in to check she was okay!  She can't have been that under the influence if she could remember all those complicated lyrics in perfect order!!!

Rollin' rollin' rollin', keep them all a rollin, Rawhide.......' click the link if you don't know it and want to understand and YES, that is a young Clint Eastwood!!  This show must have been Hollywood GOLD in the 50s and 60s!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AKC8pSFg1Vw&list=PLT9c-HDi2SiPBgz8Ehh7XwBWW_59Ru-XW

Second incident: (and just quietly, much funnier)  Mum was talking to the Hospice staff about Dad being in Hospice and how, less than two years ago, he had quietly passed away after being in a coma for a few days and how his breathing had changed etc etc.   The Hospice Nurse said that 'no two deaths are the same' and Mum (who obviously watches too much TV!!!) said to her that it was 'not like it is on TV'....... then Mum clutched her chest, did a lurch, gurgled, rolled, legs twitched, gasped and collapsed....arm falling to one side clearly DEAD!  Then she giggled and looked up with a glint in her eye!  She had just totally completed her own fake TV death!!!  The Hospice Nurse looked like she was fit to burst, (because I guess it is not really appropriate to burst out with a big belly laugh when you are in the business of death) and you tell by the delight in her eye that she was dying to get back to work to share the fake TV death story!!!

Mum lived life large and was beautifully gracious and witty to the end.  We will miss them both as we get use to the new normal without them.

We went to Christchurch this last weekend and while I can say that they have had a rotten time and the damage from the earthquakes is still hugely evident, you can always find something to lighten the load.  The something in this case comes in the form of a white van, parked outside a church.  This van has two flat tyres and is clearly going no where fast.  Then....... check out the signage on the sides :)