Lost in Translation Part 2

Hmmmm.......????  We decided that if we passed the Super Mer Cat that had the Friki wine, that as a tribute to Eduardo, we should try it.  The Super Mer Cat is not far from our apartment, so it was easy to find.  We bought some bread and cheese and salami and Aberian Ham... and of course Olives.

We bought two bottles of Friki Wine as a laugh, so that we could not only try it, but also have a blog post to share.  Well, it turns out, I may have gotten more than I bargained for!!!?????  Is it possible Eduardo got the last laugh?????  Was he seriously saying we were strange???????  I know we weren't extravagant, but then again, there is the weight of my bag to consider????

If Eduardo was talking about the info on the back of the label, then he was totally having a crack at us!!!!!!!

I have to consider that it could also be possible that we dressed weird, considering I cannot find ONE thing in Spain, Morocco or Portugal that I would wear (and it doesn't help that they are about 12 inches shorter than us!!!!!!!!) mostly because the clothes are bland and short in the body and very ordinary in their taste.

Although, it would appear for the young ladies, that holes with a few jeans around them is a fashion trend, as I have seen a lot of Spanish leg, butt, thigh, and in some cases ........... no, that surely is just a slip of the outfit...!?????  No photos, sorry! That would be producing a pornographic image!!

Man!  If I ever see Eduardo again, I'll give him Friki!!!  

Lost in Translation...???

Our bus driver for most of the trip was a Portuguese man by the name of Eduardo.  To the untrained eye, Eduardo was a grumpy old bugger, with an aversion to smiling and not much to say that wasn't a direction to anyone erring.  He didn't waste time with heartfelt lead ins when he spoke to the passengers on the bus and frankly, this situation didn't really improve with some of the people being less than charming.  He was a man of few words.

We decided it was our challenge to make Eduardo smile.  All three of us chirped 'hello' at him, offered to help, made little jokes and finally, on about day 3, Cathy got a smile out of him.

This gave us a bit of hope and we knew we had set the bar too low, so the  challenge was now to make him chuckle.  We upped the ante.  In Morocco, early one morning, Cathy needed to ask him if she could get a bottle of cold water once we were on the bus and Eduardo answered her 'Yes, my Freaky ladies'.  Cathy just laughed and came back to us a little bemused, but never the less entertained at being called a freaky lady.  I rained on her parade and said that he probably meant 'Yes, my friendly ladies' as we had been on a make him smile mission.

On our trip back from Morroco, we had to take all our own luggage off the bus and carry it through customs back into Spain, so we emptied the bus and lugged all our things onto the ferry and through the scanners and back through customs on the Spain side.  Eventually, we got to load our stuff onto the bus and there was a group of 10 - 12 of our tour with their bags, while Eduardo put the bags into the bus one by one.  He took mine and as it is rather heavy, he said in a heavy Portuguese accent,  'do you have rocks?  Have you Gibralta in here?' to which there was general laughter.  Then he said 'this bag is so heavy, you will have to stay a month'.  Now, not one to let the laughter fade like and unfueled fire, I replied 'well....... only if you ask me nicely, Eduardo' to which he chuckled and as others started to hoot and laugh, his chuckle turned to a chortle!  He was enjoying it so much, that you could see at least 9 of his 12 teeth!!!

I had no intention of being a freaky lady, or a friendly lady, but the laugh was worth it!  I think a few of our fellow travellers saw another side of Eduardo as well.

Today, we stopped in the Super Mercat (yes, super meercat is a thing here) and I was wandering the aisles, only to discover that Eduardo may well have been right when he called us Friki ladies.  He possibly had not meant freaky or friendly..... he may have just meant we were drunks!!???

The Cold War Ends in a Lift.

We had a very unusual bunch of people on our tour.  No, to be fair, we had, what eventually turned out to be a quite small group of unusually rude and socially challenged people on our tour.  Consideration of others was clearly not a priority and this group talked over people, yakked while the tour guide was speaking and generally carried on like they were the only people in any room, bus, Castilla or Church!

As a group, and as you do, we were asked to please be quiet so that others could hear.  We were told by our local guides to be quiet.  Most of us got it.  Some (read rude and socially challenged group) did not.

Anyway, my tolerance of rudeness is not high and I was the first to make a general statement to the group that we were being rude.  It didn't go down well with a certain faction and........ I was voted off the bus.  Sadly by association, my team mates were too.  Sorry New Zealand!  I have let you down!!!!  There commenced a campaign of dagger looks, behind hand sniggers, obvious discussions and side long glances and up close and personal 'completely ignore' from members of this group.

Ha!  If only they knew that bigger and less nice had had a crack and that I am virtually immune to the criticism of others.

Anywho...... the next morning at breakfast, one of the group decided to have a real go.  He was rather direct and a swear word or two was inserted, to which he got my 'I am really interested in your comments' face, followed by a full and frank explanation of my position.  It was a lead balloon moment for him and he flounced off (read in to this what you will) back to his group and much discussion was clearly had.

The tour continued, as did the campaign outlined above and I just kept clear and did my thing along with the rest of Team New Zealand.

So......... at the farewell dinner last night......there was a great big hug fest in the street with people saying goodbye etc etc and the groups were all selective in who they bothered to embrace or care to say goodbye.  Team  NZ went into the lift and we stopped at Cathy's room on the 1st floor,, to find a cork for the bottle of wine Christine had taken off the table (but that is another story...)

Christine and I headed for the 7th floor about 15 minutes later.  The lift door opened......... and.......................

Oh, Lordy it was the flouncing man and a couple of other ladies.  Well, you can't back down, so in we hopped.

He said...... verbatim..... "I am sorry for our run in during the tour.  I was wrong".   HOLY SMOKES!!!!!  I say something like '...it's fine' as I am not demonstrative and I would rather spend the time taking the daggers out of my back than playing nice with him!

Then he said 'its a shame, I think we could have been friends'  AND THEN.....  he hugs me!!!!!!!!!!!!!    Obviously the memo has not got to the rest of the world about that fun little past time and my allergic reaction to it!

If Christine had not been there, they would have thought I was making this story up!!!!  Even though Christine and I were both there, I think I am making it up!!  Such was my shock.  Good on him for having the guts to say it!!!

Life Inside the Walls.

 We are here in Barcelona, inside our little 4 bedroom, two bathroom Air BnB.  Christine found it for us online and it is very cool and I am so pleased to be out of hotels, even though they were beautiful and inside some of the buildings we have spent the last 3 weeks walking past!

The whole apartment is about 7m by 12m, with a teeny, tiny kitchen that I cannot imagine the Momma of the house cooking massive Paella for all the kids out of!  We are on the 4th floor and we sent our bags up in this rattly old iron frame lift and climbed up the marble stairs ourselves.  It looks like there are 2 apartments on each floor and the stairs and sections past the doors are so narrow, that you wouldn't be able to pass another person on any of the landings.

Each of the rooms in the apartment have some little window or slat the goes out to fresh air, but they seem to be internal shafts, I guess just designed so you can get fresh air and maybe a bit of light?

At the front of the apartment on each floor are a set of French doors and an window which opens out over the street.  The windows have these groovy little slat shutters on them and every window down the street has the same system, which I guess they use when it is really hot, to keep the direct sun out.

I am currently sitting in an armchair with my feet up, looking out the French doors into the Barcelona evening and listening to the steady hum of traffic in the distance.  No, that is just a fantasy, I am sitting in an armchair with my feet up, looking out the French doors into the Barcelona evening and listening to cars, buses, motorbikes, horns and people, who might as well be driving through this room, but...... it may be noisy, but its noisy in Spain!!!!! :)

A Bullet Ride to Barcelona!

The Madrid train station is huge and has a series of platforms, on two levels.  Coming in, you take the escalator down 3 levels to a really big area that looks a bit like an indoor tropical rainforest,  with palms and trees, it is actually rather well done.

Running round the tropical rainforest is a large area, chokka full of tortoises!  We must have stood and watched them for a good 45 minutes as they made their way up and onto the little rock islands where the sun was shining in from above.

I have discovered that delight and anticipation is the same in any language as all those watching saw tortoises struggle to climb up, struggling, struggling, nearly making it............. but no!  Splash back into the water!  There were several incidences of collective ahhhhh and hahaha and vehement cheering as the tortoises did their thing, completely disinterested in all the people watching.  We gave a commentary in English, while an Asian couple had the same convo next to us and a Spanish man held his child up to see and explained.  It was nice.

I am sure they also said in all those languages, 'that water needs a clean' and 'man there is a shed load of tortoises!'  For those of you learning Spanish, if you ever need the phrase it goes 'Hombre, hay una cargo de tortuous derramadas'

I am nothing if not helpful.

The Palace of Queluz-a brief a Scarcely Accurate Account

In 1747, some guy in Portugal (maybe the King) decided to build this palace and he took his family to live there.  Our guide described them as 'The Uglies' and certainly the pictures of them, leave quite a bit to be desired.  She told us that the Queen looked different in every single painting of her because the artist had to find some feature to focus on because he couldn't really paint what he saw, or he would never get any other commissions from the royal family!!!

As was the custom of the time, royalty married royalty, so some of the children were more fortunate in their choice of partners, but in all the paintings, there is certainly.... a family resemblance.

 I stopped taking photos after a while because ...well, they just weren't photo worthy.  This lady actually looks quite a bit like Freda Carlo, only more cranky.

This guy looks to me like he has been in the bottom of a scrum and either lost some teeth or simple ate some socks after the game!

Imagine being known for all eternity as 'The Uglies!!!???'

In fairness, I have not done the building justice.  It is remarkable and elaborate and every single surface has a mural on it, including the ceilings.  In one of the rooms, the Prince had a fascination with Don Quixote, so all the panels in the room have images from the story.

The outside gardens are once again amazing and so beautifully kept, with fountains and sculptures making is a tapestry of art.  It is inspiring!!!

Get ready for me to come home with all these ideas, Ian!!!!

The Son of Man Model

There is a 1964 painting of by Rene Magritte where a very formal man wears a bowler hat and in front of his face is an apple.  It is quite a famous image and now I think I have found the model for his painting in this guy.

Rhoda will know what I mean.....

I wonder if she might also be impressed that I do actually take things in.......???????

This may be an obscure post..... but it is my blog.

I can be obscure :)

Pick Pockets Revenge

 So this lovely man on our tour got pick pocketed yesterday at the Cathedral in Seville.  He and his wife had stopped to light a candle and he had taken his money from his pocket to pay.  He put it back in and zipped it up...... but as we know, those horrible little fingers are going to get you, if they decide to!  In a church, no less.  May they rot in hell.  The rotten fingered, go straight to hell guy, got about $120 Euro, which is no small sum, even for a Canadian.

So Clem (yes, that is his name) decided to take some revenge, albeit a small, but satisfying revenge.  He wrote this note, which he puts in the same pocket the thieving filth got into, leaving the pocket semi unzipped.  Clever and alluring!

'Get a decent job'!!!  Gold!!! As if pick pocketing is only a half decent job!?????

The best bit was the part on the back, which I decided not to include as a picture in my oh so PC blog which calls the pick pocket a phrase that starts with 'Mother.......'

Clements wife Maura, is not so impressed with his ingenuity, nor his language!  She was not finding it so funny, nor so ingenious.

I really hope he gets pick pocketed again!!! Only in that pocket, of course!!!!

Laughed Out Loud, Alone!!!

So, we are in Salamanca and from what I can see, this is a beautiful place.  We are back in the rooms and I decided to have a shower.  This is the picture of my very ordinary looking facility.    However........  it may look like an innocent rather harmless bath/shower set up.  I can assure you, it is not!!!  It is the devils work!!!!!

All I wanted was a quick shower and to wash my hair, so I fiddled with the bath part and thought I had that sussed out.  I turned on one tap first and it dribbled out the bath tap part, so that was clearly wrong.  I moved up the dials and tried a tap looking fitting and water gushed from the hand held shower head, so I knew I was on the right track, if only I could drain the bath bit.  I moved up to the next tap looking fitting.  Keep in mind I was leaning in the half glass door fully dressed...... so with the turn of the dial, water absolutely poured from a shower fitting above.  My right arm, head and back were instantly soaked, such is the water pressure!  I needed this to stop, so I turned the tap looking facility, at which point I was blasted full force in the face with maximum pressure water, which bounced off me and went all over the floor and walls on the bathroom!!!!!  I had to undress quickly, as I was now completely soaked with high pressure water and figure this out.  The bath was filling, the jets were running, the shower head was pulsing!  It was all go and the worst thing was that it was all WAY too hot to even have on your skin!!!!!!!!!

I am now writing this post to allow the water to cool off in the bath, before I hope in.  I would like to think a wash is a wash..... even if it rips your skin off, but I am too chicken to try that all over again!!!!

Restoration At Its Finest

 This is a post for you, Rhoda and you probably know all this stuff,  being the arty farty that you are, but inside the Seville Cathedral, they have all these massive works of art and slowly they are doing them up.  These two images are firstly a painting that has been restored and cleaned and it hangs on the same wall as the second one that is yet to be worked on.

The lighting and photography is exactly the same and it goes to show what years of smoke, incense, dust, dirt and general grime can do to a canvas.  I am going to take a punt that these paintings would be painted around the same time as the cathedral was built, but isn't it amazing to think those colours above lie beneath the murky smudge below.

They are also cleaning up the outside of the cathedral and apparently they use to water blast (or something similar), then they moved to chemical wash, but now they have decided it is too abrasive on the buildings, so they are doing something more gentle and you can see the result in the next two photos.  All across this area, they are restoring things to how they would have looked, which I guess is fine, but I would not like to think they would make it look Disney new and lose the obvious age of things.

I guess they know what they are doing.

The Tomb of Christopher Columbus

So we are now in the Seville Cathedral and this is the site of the tomb for Christopher Columbus and I know I don't need to explain who he was.  He sits inside this church that was built between 1401 and 1506.  Poor old Christopher has been moved quite a few times, firstly from the Dominican Republic, when the Spanish lost control of the area is 1795.  However...... the plot thickens.... much later they found a box in Santo Dominco, that was said to contain the remains of this poor nomadic bunch of bones belonging to Christopher.  So really, much like history in general, who is actually inside the box will remain a mystery!!

Inside the church is really interesting and these photos don't really do it justice, but since the majority of the people didn't actually read during this time, the church invested enormous amounts of money creating the scenes from the bible and inside the church, there are walls that depict things,  currently they are set up with lights on different parts, before the whole wall lights up, so you have images from scripture such as the birth of Christ (obviously not up close and personal!!) the parting of the sea, the loaves and fishes etc.

I believe you can see how people were influenced by the power of the church when they seemed to be able to create these amazing images that peasants or people in general could not fathom.  This coupled with the real fear, that the devil was going to come and get you if you put a foot wrong.  We were in a palace today and the guide said that the beds were not only small because the people were tiny, but also because they couldn't sleep lying down, only sitting up incase they died in the night and ...... well, I am really not sure what.  Maybe it was easier for the devil to take their soul if he had direct access through he mattress???  I know myself, that last night there was no way the devil would have been able to make it through the rock hard mattress in this hotel, but that is another story!  (not complaining!!!!)

The Seville Cathedral is another UNESCO site and I think it is an amazing example of engineering, considering each block of the place from the floor tiles to the roman arches have been designed and made by hand.

What is wrong with this picture when we have a high ceiling cathedral that was built over 500 years ago, still standing and solid as a whole bunch of rocks, but we have a school that was built on 14 years ago, that had to be demolished because it was falling down?

Ooooohh!  Did I mention the workmanship?

The Ibero-American Exhibition of 1929!

Apparently it was a huge one!  Spain built the Plaza de Espana for the Expo and all I can say is the area is absolutely stunning!  This is in Seville, so I am back tracking a bit now that I have a few moments in my room.  8.00pm!!!!!  I've already been out for a walk by myself and the sun is still up, but I would hate to get lost, so I am here to serve you, my readers!!!!

It is a monument to something very beautiful and surrounds a huge courtyard areas, that I guess is the square, regardless of the shape.  The buildings are fully made form decorated stone and has these amazing pictures around the outside, about every 3 metres, made out of tiles that show things in Spanish history.

Along the bottom of the first balcony are carved images of people famous in Spanish society and each bust is surrounded by the name of the person, from Kings to explorers.

We got there quite early in the morning, which is cool if you want the place to yourself, but it is hard to feel the atmosphere, especially when some of the stall holders started to set up with paintings and crafts, but we were already heading out.

Apparently they have a horse show once a year, where a special type of horse comes and pulls old carriages and struts their stuff and it is so popular that they have now had to limit it to 21,000 horses!!!!  Only 21???  I wonder how they arrived at that figure??

The buildings are now used as public offices, for what sounds like Council type set ups, by it was truly an amazing place to see and I bet it would be beautiful to work there.

Looking back through the covered walkway toward the entrance to Plaza de Espana

Lisbon, Portugal.

Today, we arrived in Lisbon which is a really funky city built on seven hills, on the mouth of the Tagus River.  It is a very old city, with occupation back from between 600 and 800 BC.  Like much of the rest of this area, it has been controlled by so many different groups and many of them for hundreds of years.

In 1755, they had this massive earthquake and along with it came fires and massive tsunamis that pretty much wiped out the whole area.  The leader of the city at that time was a guy who goes by a short and catchy name, Sebastian Jose de Carvalho e Melo, 1st Marquis of Pombal and he organised the rebuild of the city and created a copy of the Champs Elysees in Paris as a starting point.  It has wide streets and cool squares and any of the old buildings that owners want to remodel, have to keep the old facade, so that it remains the buildings remain with a similar flavour.  One thing that does remain though, is a aqueduct that is something like 18km long and has pieces coming off it that make the whole system about 50-something km long.  It was built in the 17th century, so was quite new when the earthquake hit.  I don't know if that had anything to do with it, but in places it is VERY high.

You will note in this picture that graffiti is huge in Lisbon.  I can't actually say I have seen anywhere near as much anywhere else, but here any surface is a canvas!

Now, this video is something to see!  It is the central square in the old city part of Lisbon which was built new late 1700's.  Very cool and clever, considering they won't have been able to drive past it to see the optical illusion, like we can!

I learned two new phrases today.  The first is 'love depressed' when the Kings best mate feel in love with the Queen and didn't stand a chance, so he became 'love depressed' and painted his house black. Weird, but true.

The second phrase was during dinner when the waiter proudly produced 'Cheese of Goat'.  He said it would be the most amazing thing we had ever eaten.  It wasn't.  It tasted like blue cheese, gone soft.  Cheese of Goat is off my menu!!!

Never Have I Seen So Many Sunrises......

I am not a morning person.  It is well documented and my poor, patient husband has to let me wake up for at least 45 minutes before a civil conversation can be had.

I have had to rewire my strategy since the early hours are called for on this tour.  Here is the sun coming up over Seville, a sight I have never seen before.....

......but I have seen it in just about every other city on this tour!

I'm not complaining, I'm just......... looking forward to coming home.....

Warm Cuddly Pets.

 I just don't get the whole performing animals thing.  Whilst I am delighted when my own dog will sit, roll over etc. at least I know (think) that the pet is getting as much out of it as I am.  Yes, that is you that I am talking about Bear and Sasquatch!!!

I don't kind of get the snake charming or the poor old monkeys.  So one guy sits and pipes on his elaborate recorder this kind of tooty music that makes the snake sway.   If the snake is being too passive they poke at it with the cushion thing, until it reacts.

Someone on our tour said that the venom teeth have been removed so the snakes can't bite anyway...... would you like to take THAT bet???

If you dare take a photo without paying!  Holy!!!  I knew they charge and had my coins ready, but NO!!! Random amounts of currency that I really do not understand were not enough!!!  Eventually, my hand in his face and several NO's for the answer got him to back off.  Come on!!!  It's only a snake!!

They don't just have one snake, they seem to have a bag of them and they poke them and toss them out on the paving at will.  The snakes are quite passive and kind of snoozy,  but I wonder if they have been warm.  Again, I don't want to find out!


The snake guys walk around with one of the snakes in their hand and bend the snake to look at tourists as they walk past.  Some people are quite happy to have the snakes draped around their shoulders, but as our guide said 'if you have decided to die in Morocco, put the snake on your shoulder or have the monkey come to you'.  I think the point is snake bite or monkey bite, it can be a short history for you!!!!

I have already told you about the guy that got bitten by the monkey, so you can understand why I stayed far, far away!!!!

Sit Bear, sit!

Sit Sass, sit!