Should Have Gone to Spec Savers.....???

We are on a work trip in Melbourne.  We have come early to take in some retail therapy and generally bond as a work team :)  Tonight we went down the road to a lovely Italian Restaurant for dinner.  I ordered Prawn Pasta and it arrived promptly, hot and yummy.  Being the vain creature that I am, I did not take my glasses out of the my bag, so I reached for the pepper grinder and put some on my meal.  It turned out to be salt, so I made a crack about 'haha, thats a heart attack waiting to happen, I should have put my glasses on"  I took that one on the chin and just laughed it off.  I then picked up the parmesan cheese container and sprinkled a little on my prawns.  I passed said parmesan cheese container on and I waited for my prawns to cool.  Christine said to me 'I think it might not be cheese....I think it is ..(???) ... sugar?  Yes, its sugar"

So I basically buggered my lovely italian meal by sprinkling parmesan cheese looking SUGAR on my food.  We then totally dissolved into stomach aching laughter, with tears rolling down our faces.  It's really lucky the waiter didn't come over and with bored indifference, try to fake real interest, 'how is your meal?"

I would have had to say 'Sweeeeeeetttt as bro!'

 Mostly however, my dinner was lovely.......... apart from the crunchy, sugary bits.

The Midnight Black Eye

Last week we had a mighty, mighty storm over Auckland!  I was very sound asleep (thank you wine) when at 12.03am a sonic boom thunder clap over our house.  It sounded more like a freight train slamming into the house.  I know not why, but I bolted out of bed and half asleep, decided to checkout where the noise had come from.

In the meantime, at the other end of the hallway Alex had got a huge fright as well and like a heat seeking ferret, had run for her mother.  Our hallway is 19 metres long and it was pitch black, mid storm.  So without a hint that anyone else was running down the hallway, we smacked into each other.  Her cheekbone caught my nose and under my eye, at which point through the pain, I realised it was only her and not some home invasion who  had gained access with a Mac Truck.  It seriously hurt, but strangely enough I got the giggles,  what 19 year old and what mother of a 19 year old has to check each other out just because there is thunder and lightening???  Serves us right, we need to examine those apron strings, me thinks......

The downside is my black eye.  Previously I could have made some vague reference to sport and got away with a black eye at school, but not so much now.  The story will have to come out and all other mothers of 19 year olds will go..... SERIOUSLY?????

NZ Politics- I knew I'd seen his face before.....

Okay, so NZ politics leaves me cold and this election has been totally awful and unkind and catty, so I enter my comparison of that thoroughly dreadful election banner. 

Seriously, Colin...??????

The Gardens Had a Little Lamb....

Three weeks ago, we had a lamb delivered on our farm that was so huge, she cause mortal problems for her mother.  I found it late at night and began the regime of being the lambs mother.  This has been happily and excitedly received at school, but love of a cute little lamb only goes so far......

The kids and parents of our city school have really embraced the lamb, she has had to have first six, then four and now three feeds per day, so coming to school was the only option.  She has had love letters, birthday cards, delivery of fleece blankets, a roster of 'supervisors', a cage set up by the caretaker, special kids getting to feed her.....etc.... etc. 

I, on the other hand, have cleaned up pee, got up in the middle of the night to feed her, lost all my ranunculus flowers from the garden, put her into my year old Calais, where she once again peed(!!!), chased her through my house!!!!!! 

She has terrified the dog, made my farmer husband exasperated and probably rather disgusted a whole group of people- due to her lack of house training......  She has eaten many important documents, annoyed people who are less tolerant of loud baaarrring and generally made her presence felt at school.

Today it ends!  She is going into the orchard and down to two feeds per day!  I have done my dash!

Tonight, when I got home,  I let her out of the car and it was raining.  I had all my usual jobs to do, so I left her out and went off to move sheep, feed pigs, feed chooks.   When I got back, she had eaten my orchid, peed on my shoes, knocked over ANOTHER pot and broken it, shat on my doorstep AND then, when I went to pick her up, she ran off about a metre, just out of reach, then another metre and then…. out into the rain- another metre, and so on and so on and scoobbie, doobie, doo-bie……  AND I said “that’s IT!” 

I was going to just put her in the orchard with her little house, but I was too angry (and it was raining) so I just stuck her in her pen and tomorrow I am leaving her there.  THAT’S IT!

No more Greenie, Mother earth, lamb loving Principal!  That's it!  Sorry to the kids on the roster for Wednesday, Thursday and Friday but I will make it up to you by........ getting some goldfish????????

Double Whammy Storm Reprieve Rainbow

This is our home.  The white house with the dark roof is our home and the brown one is a pool house which sits about 15 metres from the main house.  During the storm that has dumped so much rain on Auckland and Northland, there was a short break in the deluge and we went outside to check out the tide and the creek at the bottom of our property and looking back, we had a double rainbow linking our house with the pool house.  The photos don't really do it justice, but how cool is that!!!????

Danger Deep Water

I have kept this sign separate from the others because it is really rather ironic.  In Hong Kong, on the main street which is bustling and busy and hugely populated, there is a quiet little park.  The park is surrounded by highrise buildings and peoples washing hangs out of windows at all heights.  There is little sun that actually finds its way to the ground, through the smog and dust.

There is a man, who appears to be employed full time, cleaning up and picking up any rubbish and leaves and general items that find their way into the area.

The tranquil park has two little contemplation huts, some seats, a checkers board and a water area with a bridge.  It was really rather sweet.   By the bridge is this sign.

The water in the pond that they do not want terrapins or fish in would have been about 20cm deep.  Now I know that Asian people are not tall, but seriously?  Danger Deep Water!!!!! 

More Signs That Caused a Chuckle....

 This is a sign written by a dyslexic person which marks the house of the local thugs.  If it had been correctly written it would say........????










Okay, so it is okay to bring your dog, as long as it is on a leash, but you cannot bring your alcohol (despite the boys running the little paddle boats in Prague, drinking at the counter)  You cannot bring the evils of hard drugs or marijuana and you certainly cannot bring the device that has broken down honourable civilisations across all Europe- a Segway!

Take your drugs and you will be absinth for the rest of the day... ???

 Ouch, no Bad Gogging!

 Dunno about this one, too obvious but interesting.  Found in Germany and perhaps something to do with directions to the Pied Piper??

 A whole market...!!!????  Seriously??  And care for some Digitalkabinen?

 A rather unfortunate name for an Osteopathe Do??

Dunno, but Troll is probably not this persons first name??

 And what would inspire you to go along to this particular art shop and purchase a piece?

 Or go along to La Grande Messe and expect it to be organised?

 Or have a Babie Wedding?  smacks a little of my big fat Gypsy Wedding to me.

 Nothing to be said here.  I don't know what they are advertising and I don't want to find out....

This is the name of a shop in Hong Kong- Pig Nose Dear.  Again, I am unclear what they sell, but I don't think it is donuts....

 In case you forgot "Keep your Fingercroxx"

 Headstrong?  This is the T-shirt for you!

Wankee Sports- so  now it is a competition??