Over Xmas I spent some time with the mother of a little girl and we were laughing about the silly things that kids do. Those sweet, innocent things that make you laugh- later!
Alex had a prime place to do her 'things' and that place was the Supermarket. She once sat in the trolley and reached behind and took out the green bucket we were about to purchase. She put it on her head (as you do!) and began to sing. She made noises and sang, inside the bucket, the whole way round the shop. Mostly the noises were just 'ah (pause) ah, (pause) ah" then, after some time of her favourite 'ah' song she cracked into Barney "clean up, clean up, everybody, everywhere clean up, clean up, everybody do their shirt" (No explaining, for many years, the difference between 'shirt' and 'share') People walked past, some laughed, some frowned, some made no eye contact.........
Another time she sat in the trolley while I chatted to the woman behind me in the check out line. Eventually the woman said "have you got a big weekend planned?" pointing to Alex and the conveyer belt. I turned to find that Alex had taken many, many packets of condoms from the left of the aisle, (where normally they have the 'tempt' items, go figure!!!!) and put them on the conveyor on the right- many, many packets, my guess is about 15, piled up and fast disappearing down toward the checkout and into our shopping! Not really the look I was after!!!
Shopping embarrassments did not only occur in the supermarket. Once as we drove home with the shopping sitting on the seat beside Alex, she reached into the bag and found panty liners. Normally fairly unfun items one would think- but no! Open the packet! Have a play! By the time I caught on what was happening, she had opened the packet, striped off the sticky piece and stuck them on the window on the other side of her carseat. We travelled home with about 8 stuck to our window.
Another of her favourites was the tricky questions in the aisles-
"Mum, do you believe in GOD?" heads turned- damned if you do, damned if you don't.....
"Mum, why is that man so black?" yep, he heard, but hopefully doesn't speak English???!!!??
"Mum, I'm going to ...... blahhhhhhhhhhhh, splat! (cue green and carrot-y puddle)"
"Mum, why do boys smell" Oh, where to begin!
The justice is that one day Al will have her own children and one day she will also laugh at these stories. Just not yet........
No comments:
Post a Comment