How Far it Too Far?

 The first day of the conference was actually pretty good and the people seem to mostly be quite like minded.  I guess there is a certain vibe to being an Apple Distinguished School, so these people are not bogged down the day to day wading that can come from being in survival mode at a school.  I have always found that talking to ADS staff, there is a very fast connection because these people are looking to what is next, not what is hard at the moment.

Today we went to Nexus International School and got ideas to bring home.  Watch out team!  As Sara says ‘Susannah’s ideas creates work for other people’!

The best part of the day was visiting the ArtScience Museum, although it was a bit slow to get started, it ended with a real bang!  We saw the innovation space where kids come and have the opportunity to do heaps of activities that hopefully inspire them to create.

We then went into the Future World Space which was freaken awesome!  

And I do get ‘feeling the moment, but…….. how far is too far?  If you are looking for a measure, this is too far.

Oh So Rude Awakening!

 

We have arrived in Singapore for the conference and the shuttle leaves at 8 from the hotel.  Breakfast at 7 means out of bed too early for this sloth.

This photo makes it look like it is quite light, but no!  It is still dark outside and normal people are still sleeping.  All those lights you can see are hallways and stairs and I can count on one hand the rooms that are light up.  Mine.  One.

Pub Street

 Tonight we went out to have dinner and took a lovely tropical ride in a remorques, which is the Cambodian equivalent of a tuk tuk.  It was balmy and comfortable at whatever temperature it was and a walk was a nice option.

 We were half way through our meal when the lights started to flicker far off in the distant sky.  

It didn’t take long before the lovely festive atmosphere in the street was completely obliterated by the rain!

The heavens opened and down it came!  Not just in heavy rain, but in restaurant closing, street emptying rain, thunder and lightning.  It poured so much that the guttering was soon full and puddles appeared across the streets and it was full in about 5 minutes.  The restaurant we were in pulled all their cushions and furniture in and wound down the awnings, while everyone stood around going…….. holy, that is better pressure than the shower I had this morning!!

Call me a skeptic again, but this video below can not be good!  I know a little about how power works and I’m thinking maybe a little health and safety might not hurt considering this light was about shoulder height on me.  An orange cone anyone?

The Temples of Angkor Wat.

 I came to Cambodia to see Angkor Wat and it didn’t disappoint.  It was built around 1150 and started off as a Hindu temple and later converted to Buddhist.  It is an area of 61 km2 and inside is quite a number of temples and a large area set aside for the people to watch games.  There are records in Chinese history of it being visited in the 12th and 13th century and seems to have been pretty much abandoned for around 150 years, only to be re-discovered for the first time by the Portuguese in 1586 and then abandoned again and rediscovered by the French in 1860.  The French cleaned the place up and took it back from the forest and that must have been a huge job, but Cambodia was under the protection of France, so I guess they had to do their bit.  

When Cambodia had their war with Khmer Rouge, lots of damage and looting occurred and heaps of the statues lost their heads to be sold on the black market.  At some stage there was also a gold statue and gems such as diamonds and sapphires in one of the temples, but that would have been long gone by the time the Khmer Rouge got there, if it existed at all.  

Sara and I climbed to the top of two of the temples just to say we had and it was a fair hike to the top.  They had placed wooden stairs, albeit extremely steep wooden stairs, all the way to the top and underneath was the original rock ones.  They would have taken some navigating as they were about 15cm on the tread and about 40cm to the next step up.  I thought that was a pretty interesting design, consider these people are not tall!  Maybe only the really determined made it to the top?  They also went up about 3 storeys, so one slip and……..oops.  No heaven for you.

Inside Angkor Wat is a whole series of carved friezes telling stories and one was how your earthly life affects you in the afterlife, which was a whole lot of really?  So, if you steal and be dishonest, you get nailed into something down there and all the times you are bad, equals how many nails go into you.  If you give the side eye to people (like everyone I know does on an almost daily basis and x15 for teenagers) you go down there, lose your eyes and come back as blind people.  That is fairly harsh, but wait, if you drink alcohol and cut up rough, you go down to hell and get burned alive (although I am picking you are already dead to go there).  If you just drink alcohol and sleep, you will be okay.  Then if you are a cheater, cheater, big fat cheater and you play around on your spouse, by go down there and get bits chopped off and wait for it…….you come back as a lady boy.  Our guides words, not mine.

One of the temples we went to was where the Tomb Raider was filmed and it has huge trees growing out of the temples and you can totally see how that has happened, with the rainforest being so lush around it.  The feats of engineering for 1000 years ago are quite astounding when you consider that these buildings were multi-storey and made from individual rocks that were carried from other parts of the country and pieced together, then decorated  and kitted out.  The fact that they are still standing today after being taken over by the forest twice, is also pretty incredible.

They also had quite large reservoirs of water in man made pools.  Obviously they don’t exist anymore, but to collect and keep large bodies of water like that, would have taken some ingenuity.

I would thoroughly recommend it.

Creatures Great and Small

To be fair, we haven’t seen large numbers of different types of creatures in our travels and a distinct lack of birds.  Sara spotted a tiny frog about the size of a bottle cap the other night and we also saw a giant cockroach in Ho Chi Minh City that was making a break for it across the road.  Bad move.  Life span limiting.  This snail got spotted last night and I had to put my jandal down to give it some perspective and I am a delicate size 10, so it was a whopper.  When I was putting on my shoes this morning, I had reason to look down and the floor of the hotel suite has tiny ants moving around on it.  You would not spot them unless you were in a good light, so maybe there is more life here than we can see easily.

This little gem was taken at the temples and seriously reminded me of us as kids when we would do big time wrestling (God knows why?) and it would be every man for themselves, until someone looked like they were losing and then it was all on one.  The one that is pushed over the side is definitely Doug, I can spot the resemblance.

Thi

 

Morning in Cambodia

 Today we are touring the temples including Angkor Wat.   Yesterday our flight was delayed which made for rather a long and unfruitful day, but here we are.  We were collected by our tour guide and then we had a 50 minute drive to get us to the hotel.  Luckily it is just up the road from the temples, which is a bonus for this morning.

I was told in no uncertain terms that my dress was inappropriate for here and that shorts and no sleeves were no okay.  Sepa and Sara got the tick of approval and all of a sudden I understood how the young women of Salem, Massachusetts felt.  Today I am dressed in much more……school type clothing.  In fact, I am pretty sure I have worn exactly this!

Yesterday morning, in Ho Chi Minh City I went for an early walk and I went blocks past the Tu Thuhk Markets.  On my way back down, I was passed by a motorbike (1 or only 50 000 000) and I noticed the rider because she had this big sort of cape on and a long thing poking out the front of the bike.  I kept an eye on her out of randomness as I wandered back toward the market.  By the time I had got to her, she had unravelled her cape, put on her glasses, taken out her cane and was making her way down the sidewalk as a BLIND PERSON!  I have not seen too many beggars, but that was her ploy.  More power to her, but surely that must be one huge poke in the eye of karma?

The Reunification Palace

 Our tour took us to this place and it is clearly something they are proud of.  It was the palace for the president until it was taken out by a couple of bombs in the mid 70s.  It is a huge building that they used not only as a residence for the pres, but also for official state functions.

  In the cultural melting pot that is Vietnam, it was designed with European elements out the back to let the air in and in the front, they had to add the fountain because it faced up the main road and it was bad Feng Shui for the main entrance to face the road.  The fountain apparently washes all the bad spirits, so that makes it okay to face the road.  If you are Chinese. 

Inside the house is heaps of huge meeting rooms and entertainment places.  In one area there is an enormous room for domestic meetings and in the very next room an enormous room for international meetings.  I am picking that the pres could only attend one and a time, so why two rooms?  It is all decked out in yellow and red and there is a pecking order to colours, with yellow being the presidents colour and red is the next one.  No one else is supposed to use those colours, so that is limiting and a little selfish, I thought.

In the family area there were a whole lot of things given to the family and here are three elephant feet.  I wonder how you go about giving elephant feet to someone, because those elephants are going to miss those.  They were all different sizes as well, so not from only one poor elephant.  I am picking that they must be really old, considering the palace was not lived in again after the bombing.

The most interesting part of the whole place was the bunker, which is underneath the palace and you go down a heap of stairs and into this part of the house.  Its wall are made of concrete and metal, so it was fully protected from the bombs.  The place has been basically left as it was, with the maps and charts on the walls and all of the communication equipment still there. 

During the war they separated each area out, so the people were easier to control and this chart has the populations of each area and the map showing the districts.  

The second picture is the number of how many foreign troops from each country were there at the time.  So on the 29th June 1968 there were 363601 American troops in Vietnam and if you look down you will see that Tan Tay Lan had 523.  That is us!  I am picking that Uc might be Australia?  

To be that detailed during a war is actually pretty impressive, I thought.  All hand written and tidy and still on the wall 2 bombs and 57 years later.

Health and Safety Is Everyone’s Responsibility

 So I am picking that Health and Safety in Vietnam is not the big deal that we have in our country.  There are not the layers of risk management, stop/go signs, CONES, guys with walkie talkies directing everyone within an inch of their lives.

Not such issue here.  I have already mentioned the lack of life jackets for kayaking and of course the road safety where I suspect safety is not actually a word in their vocabulary.  The power sockets don’t seem to be attached to the wall and when you pull out a plug, it sparks. The electrical wiring is free form and there can never be too many wires.  Verandah rails come in any height and most disconcerting were the ones just high enough to take your knee out.  

In Hanoi the whole centre of a street was dug up and I am not sure if there was a plan to refill the road, but they had packed sandbags into the trench.  Smart, I guess, but damn uneven.  I have also mentioned the guy welding on the side of the road, in the market with no goggles, with people walking past.  I glanced and got white glare, imagine what his eyesight will be like after a whole day?

In Hoi An there were repairs to the middle of the road, so there they were, digging a whooping great hole in the middle of an intersection.  They had a jack hammer and the poor sod working it had no hearing protection at all.  Not a hard hat nor cone in sight, bless them.  And in this photo, you can only see two consultants standing round, doing a health and safety audit.

Also, further down the way they were cleaning up trees over the road, so the centre of the road is full of chopped down branches and there are bits falling everywhere, while scooters and people pass by and in amongst it and on the side of the road, is this man swinging a fearsome looking 450mm hooked knife.  Just on the side of the road, while we pass.  As you do.

This photo below does not do justice to the job being done.  It is coming up to Typhoon season, so all the trees in the resort had to be lopped and tidied up.  This guy carried his ladder along the side of the pool, propped it onto a wooden pergola structure and after two attempts to get it even enough, up he went.  In his hand, that sadly can’t be seen is a machete and he is hacking off branches and letting them fall, whilst balancing on the skinny bit of timber that makes up the pergola roof.  Call me a skeptic, but I just feel that that is a recipe for disaster.  Hold my beer, while I give him a hand.

Could not go far without mentioning school pickup.  I actually have a new found understanding for why some of our parents drive like they do.  This blew my mind.  You most precious things in the world put 4 deep on to the scooter, no helmets, to weave in and out of other parents doing exactly the same thing.  There are no road rules and I did not see a teacher type person in sight.  God, could you imagine if suddenly I was transported to a school in Vietnam?  After day 1, I would be the ancient, old, gray haired lady suffering from drop off and pick up trauma.  Our own place is almost too much some days, but this would probably make me cry!

And then there is this guy.  I am thinking he is some sort of security detail at the Reunification Palace.   There are several concerns, not the least being the angle of his ladder.  What is he doing up there?  Seems that is what the other fulla is saying to him?

He is wearing no shoes, he is up a tree, his ladder is post 90 degrees, he can’t actually reach it easily and he is inside a heavily secured public treasure (not the tree, obviously)

I am hoping that is not the smoko room?

Finally, there was an ounce of control trying to be enforced today.  We went to cross the road with our guide and a little green man (not alien)  blew his whistle and gestured us over to where he was standing at a pedestrian crossing.  Our previous experience with such things as cars stopping at the pedestrian crossing doesn’t really instil confidence, but this guy had a whistle, a green uniform AND a partner.  So the two green men stepped onto the road and blew their whistles.  They both put their hands up for the universal stop gesture and…….scooters just kept on coming.  A number of whistle blows later and we had navigated the crossing and at least 50 scooters were unencumbered by our crossing, travelling on as if green men had not whistled at them.

Surely if we took all the over the top safety stuff from our lives, we could get back to people actually recognising something is dangerous and acting appropriately?  Surely?  I for one would not miss the orange cones…………

Cu Chi Tunnels- Reversing Without Beeping.

 Today we travelled about an hour out of Ho Chi Minh City to the tunnels that were used by the Vietcong during the Vietnam war. As you can imagine they are pretty elaborate and go deep into the ground.  The first layer sits about 2m down and that is the area that can be used to fight from and to disappear and pop up somewhere else.  The second layer has meeting rooms and areas for living and cooking and they are about 5m down.  The final layer is small spots to rest and can be as deep as 10m down.  Our guide said that the gaps to sleep are about 30cm, so that would be awesome!

Each of the layers can be closed off to appear like they are not there and others have hatches that drop you into pits full of spiky metal taken off the American bombs.  It is a total labyrinth and was up to 250km and big parts of it were linked together like a spiders web.  Inside are some of the booby traps that were made by the VC to kill anyone following and they are pretty brutal.  Pits dug into the ground with spikes from recycled metal dropped as bombs and the ground opens up and down you go.  The idea is that the soldier did not die quickly, but screamed the place apart to scare all the other soldiers.  Grim, but effective. 

One cool thing was the ingeniousness of the VC and the footwear that they made out of rubber from US tyres and they made shoes in two sizes and wore one on back to front, so their footprints were confused and not clear because it looked like two people going in different directions.  Smart. 

One of the other traps was rigged up over doors and when the door was opened the whole contraption swung down and copped the person in the chest with full on barbs.  Once the US soldiers got wize to that, they added a hinge bit at the bottom, so if you held up the first bit, the second bit would take you out.

The biggest tunnel was around 800mm and the smallest about 200mm.  Imagine that!  When you see footage of the VC scrambling out of them, they make it look so simple.

Despite saying I was not going to go down into the tunnels, FOMO, for which I am famously well known, got the better of me and I said ‘yeah, I’ll give it a crack’ and Sara also thought she might give it a try.  So despite our guide saying hold onto your bags in the front, I handed mine to Sepa and down we went……

The first part was quite easy and was about 1m high, that went on for about 4 or 5m until it hit a square pit that was a step down.  My foot searched for steps, but no, it was down and about 800mm.  I went down and then stepped into the continuing tunnel.  I took about 4 steps and with my back rubbing on the roof and my head donging off it, I suddenly decided another 15m was too much for this chicken!  I backed up really quickly and made the young Australian guy behind me back up because he had only just navigated the 800 drop without steps.  I arrived back to where Sara was in the first bit of tunnel and said something extremely eloquent like ‘F&%$ that’ and scrambled up the steps to light and freedom.  I put Sara off, but I also put the Australian guy off and two Spanish people who were also in the first chamber. There may have been more.  I created a vibe.  I’m a trend setter, if nothing else.

I tried to video my trip, but all I videoed was my own shirt and the audio is probably not for public consumption.  

You Need Togs to Go Swimming

So, one of us forgot to bring togs, so we scoured the shops at Hoi An to find something that could be used to get out of the heat and cool off.  After much miming of freestyle, followed by questioning faces and points at one of us, we finally located a teeny, tiny Asian bikini made for a good sized Kiwi.  

Despite there not being that much of the bikini, there were two pieces that were surplus to requirements, so were abandoned in the bathroom on the way to the pool.

Another of us went into the bathroom and after much giggling and a series of exclamations, the question was asked:  What are these things on the towel rack?

I voted cool eye masks.  Just put them in the fridge and then get them out and put them on to soothe those tired traveller eyes.  We could not get much sense out of one of us, and yes you guessed it, it was the owner of the new togs, but I do notice that they have disappeared off the bathroom bench and are ready to be used if any sort of enhancement is needed at some later stage.  

Sepa is going to kill me for that last sentence.

Seriously?

Driving in Vietnam is like being stuck inside a video game.   Especially night driving.   There appears to be no rules at all and at times there are no road markings.  The video should have started about 1/2 hour earlier when it really was insane.  Next time.

People toot to tell you that they are there, but not in an angry way.  There doesn’t appear to be any road rage or annoyance and things mostly move quite fluidly.  Everyone goes along in quite a sedate manner until you hit what must be the more major roads and then it is a much fast game, by the same rules.

In NZ we count dead possums on the road, or yellow cars to pass the time on a road trip, but here it is a whole new ball game! 

I need Angus here, but if there were rules to the driving in Vietnam game, this would have to be some of them from what I have seen here on the roads.  These are not made up scenarios.

Any one in the vehicle can gather points.  Go!

Five Point Items

Pass a driver on a motorbike -  Should be able to rack up heaps of points on this alone!

Pass a driver carrying one other passenger DOUBLE POINTS

Pass a driver carrying two other passengers TRIPLE POINTS

Pass a rider carrying three other passengers etc. etc points wize, until you lose your imagination about how many people you can actually get on one motorbike.  

Ten Point Items 

Pass a driver:

Carrying a child too young to hold up their own head

Carrying three or more generations

With baby strapped on to driver.  At the back, minus 2, at the front, plus 2.  I know which I think would be safer and when I say ‘strapped’ that is a loose phrasing.

Riding against traffic on either side of the road, or both. 

In suit and tie.  Double points for crocs or slides instead of shiny shoes

Missing large and vital pieces of the bike.  Brakes optional.

Twenty Point Items:

Pass a driver:

Unable to be seen due to being swamped with the load he is carrying

With two side saddle carriers 1 cubic metre, each full of what appears to be supplies for a restaurant.  No wrapping included

With trailer over 1.5 m long

Eating.  Bonus points if it is with chopsticks.

Wearing a pink shirt, pink shorts, pink shoes and pink bike

Carrying a big box under one arm that prevents use of the brakes

Fifty Point Items:

Pass a driver:

Carrying a freezer.  Chest.

Carrying 5m of roofing iron

Carrying a pile of 4m plastic conduit

With view hindered by boxes stacked between legs and using chest to balance the load

With absolutely no skin showing.  Bonus points if gown is flapping and likely to get caught in said motorbike.

With a passenger side saddle and on their phone.  Bonus points if both hands on the phone

Who has a child standing on a box in front to see over the steering handles

With a full front carrier blowing ash or soil onto driver

Overtaking a break neck speed with no regard for anyone else

Carrying a passenger with a broken leg, sticking out into the traffic.

With a piece of furniture on board.  Bonus points if there is also a matching carpet.  Additional if 1.5 or larger and rolled.  Lose points if the rolled carpet takes out another rider from behind whilst in your view.

Hundred Point Items:

Pass a driver:

Who looks like Hannibal Lecter, in the mask. 

With plumbing fittings including a full toilet suite

With a crotch full of cabbage leaves in a bag that comes up to chest height

With a passenger holding boobs of driver.  Bonus points if additional riders in same pose.

Carrying a pet.  Double points if pet is in a clear plastic bag, or frothing at the mouth

Five Hundred Point Items:

Pass a driver:

Riding parallel to road in wasteland and keeping pace with traffic

With driving that causes any other driver to change expression

Who you know is there, but can’t see him for the smoke from the truck in front

Pass a pair of motorbikes carrying the same cargo (for example an air conditioning unit each) DOUBLE POINTS

Lose a Hundred Point Items:

Have a rider you have previously scored points off  pass you (multiplied every time the lead changes)

You have to brake

Pass a rider on motorbike, talking on the phone (too easy)

You have to indicate

You cannot get through an entire roundabout without braking or indicating

You have to change out of low gear 

Lose A Thousand Point Items:

Get passed by a driver on a motorbike who is breastfeeding (True story!!)

Don’t change out of low gear even if the car is shaking and threatening to stall

Hit a fellow player - GAME OVER

Copyright. 

We Found the Missing Purple Wiggle!

 In Hoi An, we went to a traditional dance and I am going to say it was a little odd.  Of course we don’t understand the culture or the story, but I put myself in the shoes of a Vietnamese person turning up for a Māori performance and thought odd is probably what they would think too.

At least there was one insightful moment and that was when we discovered what had happened to the original purple wiggle (or at the very least, his reincarnation).   After being replaced,  he moved to Vietnam and took up dancing for tourists!  If I had been sitting next to Lisa, I would not have been able to control myself!  I am trying to think of some funny Wiggles song that fits……??

Isn’t it sad that that was the highlight of my experience with traditional dance.  

I probably need to be a deeper thinker.  

Hoi An

 Hoi An is a really interesting place and I wish we had had more time to spend here.  The Ancient Town is around 6 blocks of really well preserved buildings that made up some of the port from when it was a trading centre on the Silk Road in the 15th and 16th Century.  Vietnam seems to have been invaded by one or another country for its whole time and this area reflects that with Chinese, Japanese and some French influences.  We did a city tour in the morning, which took us through the markets and we hit all the high points.  The Japanese Bridge, built to help them do business across the river.  No brainer.  

We went inside the home of a wealthy Chinese trader and 8 generations of his family had lived in the house since.  They showed marks on the wall where floods had come through and in 1964 it was nearly up to the ceiling of the first floor.  When it floods, they have these lattice pieces in the floor above and they whip those out and put all their precious stuff up one floor.  We went into one place and by day it is a shop and place to have a look at the inside of the house and by night it is the house to 3 generations.  Imagine how tidy you would have to be?  Except on the days around new year when you don’t have to sweep or throw anything out for 3 days, just in case you sweep all your good luck out the door.

Next we went to a Chinese meeting house.  Apparently 4 groups came to Vietnam and set up their meeting houses, but the one we visited is a place where they can all come.  Some to ‘meet’ and some to ‘pray’.  It does seem like there is quite a lot of praying to random things, but I am sure they understand it all.  There is a ghost time when all the spirits come back and……..I dunno, check you are not using the good plates?  The meeting houses was full of spirals of incense that hung from the ceiling and from what I could understand, you made wishes and set the incense on fire and it burned away for about a month.  Pretty full on nose wize!

At the end of the day we went back down to have something to eat and that was pretty cool.  You definitely knew that you were in an Asian country!

 

Bathrooms the World Over II

 

How is this little gem?  More than half of this path to the toilet is taken up by the thing that helps you step into the shower. 

Move it, I hear you say?  No!  It is fully bolted to the side of the bath.  There is no moving that sucker to ensure that your night path to the very useful item at the other end (and I don’t mean the bin) is free from obstruction.

So, in their attempt to support health and safety they have created a health and safety issue.  It is solid too!  Not some little, light bamboo number.  And did I mention that with the lights out, this room is dark as ……….well, night?

My toe did not meet it in the wee small hours, but from the marks on that front corner, I suspect I may have gotten off lightly.

Since health and safety is everyone’s responsibility.  I wonder how you say ‘this is a dumb idea’ in Vietnamese?  Or, is it revenge on annoying tourists?

What’s Up and What’s Down in Ha Long Bay

 Upon reflection this is where I am at:

UPS

The service.  Couldn’t fault it.

The FOOD - every 4 course meal of the whole trip was amazing

The private beach and the walk in through the cave

Surprisingly, the cooking lesson.  Our guide was actually a real person and quite funny.

The beauty and strangeness of it all.  No wonder King Kong was filmed there.

DOWNS

No access to the water, water everywhere and not a way to swim (from the boat)

Very little in the way of birdlife?  Not sure why.

The staff member who Sepa got put out with by putting water on the floor from her sneakers (hahahaha, it was actually pretty funny.  Be cranky all you like, we have dealt with much better angry sulking)

Sadly, the rubbish in the water.  That was a real downer.  All that one use plastic!  Ban it!

That is about it really.  It was very interesting and I am glad I have been there, but that was enough.  I don’t need to see every single one of those 1969 (accurate now) rocks sticking out of the ocean.  So few are inhabited and I can see why because they are steep and rocky and looming, with shear faces and very few beaches or places to land a boat.  

I can also see why it is UNESCO listed, but they need to do some serious thinking about how they are going to clean the place up.  Up until now I understood the pollution in the ocean on a theoretical basis, but having seen it I am shocked about what it looks like in reality.

This picture is not storage for a fishing village, it is the flotsam and jetsam of stuff washed into a little cave.  This is about mid tide.  Very confronting.

 We are finally in Hoi An, with a bit of decent internet, so time for some catch up.  

During our 4 course lunch in Ha Long Bay, we experience a true tropical storm.  One minute it was fine and sunny and the next there were these ominous rumblings and flashings from off to one side.  Initially it could have been something associated with one of the big ships that were out in the bay, but after a bit of fork lightening, we knew it was all on.  The crew pulled up to a large anchor bouy and tied the boat up and we ate our lunch whilst the storm rolled in.  It blew the boat back and forward and when the thunder let go, it actually shook the windows.  We were in quite a sheltered spot, but it still was a bit spooky when it sounded like a drum was being banged directly over the boat and the thunder rumbled on for more than 30 seconds and the rain came down in bucket loads.

The early afternoon activities were cancelled and we had some time to do a bit of catch up - without internet.  So I was unclear what it was we were catching up on.  No news.  No email.  No Whats App.  Hello 1983!

The storm eventually knocked itself out and it was clear enough for us to go onto the next activity, which was a cave visit.  Didn’t sound particularly exciting, but it was actually very cool.  The cave was above sea level and had been made by wave action millions of years before.  The ceiling had a pattern that appeared to be hollowed out waves and inside were limestone stalactites and stalagmites making cool looking structures.  

There was this massive Typhoon in 1994, just before the whole area went into protection and 150 of the fishing families stayed in the cave for 5-6 days hiding out because their village was being trashed and a bunch of people from the Ha Long Bay Area died in the storm.  I am not sure that would have been too pleasant as the rainwater makes its way down the stalactites and drips on the floor, so it would have been all wet anyway.  I guess the upside is that they had plenty to drink?

The Typhoon’s seem to be huge in the area and the damage from one last year is still evident with building structures and roof’s blown off in the area, still not repaired.  Things take their owns sweet time to get sorted around here.

A Morning of Thing I Do Not Normally Do.

 Yesterday started with a morning session of Tai Chi on the deck.  Yes, I did that and again this morning, so I am like an old hand.  Then we climbed a mountain on an island which is the only island that tourists go onto in big numbers.  It was called Ti Topk (and I will correct that later, if it is wrong).  It is 400 steps straight up and Sepa and I climbed it like mountain goats, albeit old, over heated, breathless mountain goats.  Once at the top we had a 360 view of Ha Long Bay, if you don’t count the trees in the way and the freezers of the guy selling cold drinks.  Down was quite a bit faster than up as there was a beach at the bottom with our names on it and we must have evaporated half of the bay when we went in.

Next was a boat ride under a cave, where our driver found a cellphone in the water and that excited him almost to facial expression stage.  We went into a sort of lagoon and the driver said the monkeys get fed at 9 0’clock.  It was 8.56, so he turned around and took us back out.  He did not seem too keen to wait the 4 minutes for us to see.  I think there must be a bounty on reclaimed cellphones that had his full attention.

Sepa was onto the Monkey Man’s antics far quicker than I was.  He totally ripped us off for the want of 4 minutes.

All that before 9.30am.

I Always Wanted My Own Private Beach

 Around 5pm yesterday, we had the opportunity to go for a swim, so Sepa and I got our gear and scrambled onto the motorboat.  We went around a few little bays and pulled in at what looked like the entrance to a cave.

Inside the cave, it opened up and we could walk through an area where it had been hollowed out through erosion over millions of years.  There were quite a few stalactites and we could also hear some bats calling, which we spotted on the way out.

At this point it was a bit of a maze, but we knew we were going to end up going for a swim, so we hung in there, despite the drips from above that could have been lime drips, but could have been bat drops.

I am going to call it well worth the walk!  We have a beach that was just for us and it was surrounded by high rocks and open at the very far end to the sea.  It was warm enough to be nice to get into, but refreshing enough to know you have been for a swim.  There were two downsides, first was the walk back meant that we needed another cooling dip by the time we got there and the second was the Something About Mary moment with the bat poo, but that’s another story.

Ha Long Bay, Three Teeth and the Kind Offer of Smokes.

 We left Hanoi yesterday and arrived around 11 at Ha Long Bay, where the boat met us to take us out to the islands.  We are the only people on this boat and we have a fully attentive staff of 5 or 6 (yet to be determined.  There is some debate).  The meals have been absolutely over the top fantastic, with all being 4 courses!  We are unable to even put a dint in what is put in front of us, but we do our best.

Yesterday we travelled out into the bay and the photos don’t really do it justice.  It is layer upon layer of around 1998 high rock islands, covering 1500 square kilometres.  It is hot and muggy and everywhere you look is amazing scenery.  

Once we got to our first stop, about 2 hours in, the first option for activities was kayaking, so the three of us did a bit of eye rolling and discussing that maybe we didn’t really want to kayak.  I clearly and not the mastermind of this group, because when we arrived at the kayaking spot, I was up on the deck, suffering in case FOMO kicked in and the other two were ‘sleeping’ in their room.  Nice for some.  So, I had to take one for the team!  I said I would do it and I am not going to explore the fact that I am the oldest and probably the least fit, but they hung me out to dry due to their need for zzzz’s.

I am going to do my best to describe this to you, because it is worth the imagery.  Tucked into this very sheltered bay, with high cliffs all around was a floating platform covered in about 80 kayaks.  In the centre was a bit of a roof, with a whacked together table arrangement and bench seats.  Behind the table was a hammock, with a guy asleep in it, who did not wake or even move the whole time I was there, so I am only assuming he was alive.  Above the table was an attic type deck and a ladder and that was where they slept. Open walls around the whole thing and there was stuff everywhere!  They only leave the place about every two weeks to stock up on supplies, so I am guessing hanging on to things is quite essential.

Anyway, the guy who ties up the ropes on our boat and the guy who drives the boat helped me off and took me over to the table.  The owner of the kayaking place, who we shall call Three Teeth, invited me to sit down and then waved a cup of tea, about the size of an egg cup in front of me.  I nodded, because I am nothing if not polite and was delivered this little cup and a top up from the tea pot.  It tasted like Manuka wood with a bit of lemon, so I had a sip and pretended to like it.  Minutes of Vietnamese conversation later, he offered me a top up, to which I said no and Three Teeth looked at me like I was mad.  The driver decided I was missing out, so offered me a smoke, of which I declined.  Three Teeth took the moment to take my egg cup Manuka Tea and threw the contents of it off the deck.  He then swished it out with hot water and threw that off the deck.  Then being a paragon of cleanliness, he used his finger to wipe out the inside of the little cup, before filling it with tea and passing it back to me.  So lucky.

Another top up and two cigarette offers later, I decided I had had enough of sitting, not being part of a conversation they clearly knew I could not understand, so I made a ‘can I swim’ gesture and they all nodded and pointed around the side.  I went around thinking I was going to get in because it was humid as Hades, only to discover that although I could get in, I could not see any way of getting back on to the platform and the last thing I wanted was to fuel Three Teeth’s war stories by having to get them to push and pull me out of the water.  So I put my feet in and waited to see what would happen.  Our guide, who I can call Hero, because that is his name, eventually came and got me into a kayak (life vest-less) and off I went.  Once that was done, or more accurately 15 minutes later when I was losing the will to live, I came back and pulled up alongside.  I still had the image of pushing and pulling me out of the water to contend with, so I simply rolled off the side of the kayak and onto the deck and was standing, albeit covered in sand, grit, dirt all down one side, by the time they came to see if I wanted to get out.  I hope they don’t have cameras.  It was not dignified, coordinated or athletic!  Three things I clearly usually am.

I took one for the team and I made it home alive.  Now they owe me! 

On to the next adventure!

The Purpose of a Road is in its Name

 Our guide this morning explained to us that in the Old Quarter, each street is named after the things that are sold there.  So it is easy to go, oh, Meat Street, or Spice Street, but I went Linen Street, when it was in fact Cotton Street, so there are traps for young players.  Hardware Street was another, could be Metal Street, or Weld on the Footpath without Safety Goggles Street, but we got there in the end.

The one that Sara was looking for was called Train Street and if you are thinking along the lines of Train your Dragon, or teach your dog to sit, you would be wrong.  This street was created around 1902 when the French built the railway line that connects Hanoi to the rest of Vietnam.  Over time this street became the home to railway workers and they originally built their homes about 12m back from the railway line.  However, in the ultimate game of urban creep, the cafes and shops are less than a metre from the railway line that it is STILL IN USE.

So we sat on some really tiny chairs outside the cafe and everyone else around us took a seat and down the rumbling track came a normally sized freaken train!  I tried to video it on my phone, but I was alarmingly conscious that my knees were within striking distance of an entire train, so the filming took second sport to the cringing and trying to be small.

Fingers crossed the video works.

Hanoi

 This morning we had a walking tour of Hanoi,  throughout the chaos of what appears to be not a road rule in sight, including which side of the road you use.  People, cars, vans and mostly scooters are everywhere and our guide told us to ‘just keep walking’ so crossing roads, big and small becomes a test of will to live.  You just look forward and amble in a semi slow speed and any hint of hesitation could mean potential loss of life.  No one goes really fast and no one gets angry, which is why it seems to work.  In fact, as a sideline, no one seems to have any particular emotion at all on the street.  Not a smile, or a scowl, but I did see an assumed husband and wife stall owners having a go, so I guess it does happen.

Our guide showed us an alleyway that was barely bigger than my shoulders and showed us that 5 power boxes were attached, so 5 dwelling came off the alley.  The actually building was about 2.5 m across, not including the alley and she said that some people have homes that are around 3m2.  Total.  What does that even mean?  She said that each generation can build on top of the existing house, so that is how you can tell how many generations live there.

We then went to a private dwelling that was fascinating.  Built around a central courtyard in a very French style, with high doors and shutters and lovely little decks off the exterior rooms.  Inside the first storey was a deck that went all the way around and looked down on the central ground courtyard, with what had contained a fish pond and gardens.  It seems to have had 3 parts and at one time employed up to 10 house keepers to keep it looking swish.  The place had originally been built when the French were in control of Hanoi and her great grandfather worked for the French and was a man of means.  Then around 1955, the French left and the communist government took over.  So the home, that was clearly something amazing to behold 70 years ago, was taken back by the government and the family were allowed to keep one floor and the rest was given to other people.  It then became a school, so this family lived in one side of the first floor of the mansion and a primary school operated downstairs.  Then in 2018, the school moved out and ………nothing happened to the rest of it, it has been empty for 7 years.  

The lady who owns the bit we saw is clearly very proud of her spot, but it really did need some work.  Maybe a bit of water tightness fixing, some paint, a re-hash of the drains and sewers.  Not to mention what OSH would make of the little decks or the evenness of the ground.

I love seeing how people live and that was an eye opener.  Just goes to show the difference between needs and wants really.  If you can share 3m2 and be happy then……………..maybe that is why their moods are so inscrutable?

And just as an aside, would this be the ultimate neighbour from hell?  How many speakers is that pointing right at her side?

Bathrooms All Over the World……. Are Weird.

So, if you are following this blog you may wonder why we do not have a ‘we are here’ or ‘here is our trip’ and the reason for that which may come to light when it becomes funny.

So….to the bathroom.  You will see on the left, a perfectly serviceable plughole.  Looks normal.  Notice if you will the loosely decorative tile beading that runs about 10cm from the wall, along the wall and behind the toilet to the floor waste on the right.

The water from that drainpipe comes out where the bath tiles meets the floor and it drains all the way along that tile beading and down the floor waste.  That is either a totally brilliant solution to a plumbing problem, or a complete misunderstanding of how effective drainage works.

I am going to reserve judgement.  At least it beats the bathroom on the 13th or so floor in Buenos Aires that filled up with water.

Okay, not such a funny blog, but I am just warming up.  

 

The Countdown is On!

 This time next week, we will be in a warm place as opposed to inclement spring in New Zealand.  Roll on Vietnam, Cambodia and Singapore.

It may look nice outside that window of our school, but the wind chill factor is Antarctic!